while os.environ['NUMBER_OF_PROCESSORS'] > 0:
    try:
        while (assert self==OK):
            nerdify()
    except AssertionError:
        urllib.urlretrieve(
          'http://stackoverflow.com', self.head)
        time.sleep(5)
        os.startfile(self.head)
        continue

(when you want to understand what you wrote for your computer to understand, you wish you had written in Python)